http://infj.tribe.net/thread/562ea2cf-55fd-489d-bd74-0157361b29cd?format=rss Tribe.net. Local Connections http://infj.tribe.net/thread/562ea2cf-55fd-489d-bd74-0157361b29cd#2d0fd650-1d74-4f36-8da4-f12496672c63 Thanks for everyone's comments and insights. I appreciate each and every point/suggestion/clarification made. Meki Thu, 16 Jul 2009 02:25:40 GMT http://infj.tribe.net/thread/562ea2cf-55fd-489d-bd74-0157361b29cd#2d0fd650-1d74-4f36-8da4-f12496672c63 Meki 2009-07-16T02:25:40Z http://infj.tribe.net/thread/562ea2cf-55fd-489d-bd74-0157361b29cd#63945472-06f1-47eb-a52e-6154a7d43416 *now* trying to figure out... Thu, 16 Jul 2009 02:23:05 GMT http://infj.tribe.net/thread/562ea2cf-55fd-489d-bd74-0157361b29cd#63945472-06f1-47eb-a52e-6154a7d43416 Meki 2009-07-16T02:23:05Z http://infj.tribe.net/thread/562ea2cf-55fd-489d-bd74-0157361b29cd#382855ec-aa3e-40ab-a5c5-3c16e834dff1 Yeah, thanks Rick. I am not trying to figure out how to speak to him away from ANYONE. It is quite hard because of our community. Thu, 16 Jul 2009 02:21:43 GMT http://infj.tribe.net/thread/562ea2cf-55fd-489d-bd74-0157361b29cd#382855ec-aa3e-40ab-a5c5-3c16e834dff1 Meki 2009-07-16T02:21:43Z http://infj.tribe.net/thread/562ea2cf-55fd-489d-bd74-0157361b29cd#142562b7-102a-429a-8616-bb7d5cf9032b This is it to a T. Right on. I would shut down like a water on a flame if there was any kind of aggressioin needed to get the girl...even if it's imaginary aggression. It's all about intimacy and one on one. 3 is a HUGE crowd to an INFJ. Catching an INFJ is easy if your heart is intense and you are being true to who you are. I am attracted to women who are quirky, sensitive, and not extremely popular...but can be outgoing. Wed, 15 Jul 2009 20:20:09 GMT http://infj.tribe.net/thread/562ea2cf-55fd-489d-bd74-0157361b29cd#142562b7-102a-429a-8616-bb7d5cf9032b $item.owner.firstName 2009-07-15T20:20:09Z http://infj.tribe.net/thread/562ea2cf-55fd-489d-bd74-0157361b29cd#de119bdd-4cb0-4405-86c4-5d3cded2d890 Wow Jack! It sounds like you hit the nail on the head. I'd prefer to be a "magnet" instead of having to be the pursuer. I get exhausted looking for someone to connect with but if I just let things happen naturally, someone's bound to be attracted to my "mysterious" personality. :o) Thu, 09 Jul 2009 01:27:51 GMT http://infj.tribe.net/thread/562ea2cf-55fd-489d-bd74-0157361b29cd#de119bdd-4cb0-4405-86c4-5d3cded2d890 Nat 2009-07-09T01:27:51Z http://infj.tribe.net/thread/562ea2cf-55fd-489d-bd74-0157361b29cd#159f0ea5-d397-4fd8-8f9c-d19a3ad595eb Yes Jack, thank you for all of your points as well. I need this type of insight. Thu, 09 Jul 2009 01:04:03 GMT http://infj.tribe.net/thread/562ea2cf-55fd-489d-bd74-0157361b29cd#159f0ea5-d397-4fd8-8f9c-d19a3ad595eb Meki 2009-07-09T01:04:03Z http://infj.tribe.net/thread/562ea2cf-55fd-489d-bd74-0157361b29cd#01292698-4225-480c-93dd-233239c03a6d Meki, I would recommend you forget tradition when it comes to interacting with an INFJ male--remember, the INFJ male is the rarest breed of all , only .5% of the population, and although INFJ males might have exceptional moral/ethical standards, they're hardly the "traditional male." Afterall, INFJ's are characterized as caring, gentle, sensitive, affectionate, artistic, symbolic, introspective, etc... Those are hardly traditional male characteristics--at least not traditional American male characteristics. I find it extremely attractive when a female shows her attraction toward me and asks me out. I don't find it controlling or domineering, or that somehow I won't have a leading disposition in the relationship. In fact, I lead by listening and responding instead of directing or initiating (I'm a psychologist by trade so it's natural anyway). In other words, there are other ways to lead a relationship as a male than the traditional bossy/initiation style. Instead, I find it satisfying that the woman wants to spend time with me, and takes the initiative to do so. I recently had an ESTJ who asked me out tell me men should be "magnets;" we should draw the women to us instead of "going to get her." I don't see anything wrong with that at all. Just move forward and initiate. If he freaks out it probably just means that he doesn't really know who he is anyway, which means he's not all that self aware, which means he may not be ready for a great long term relationship yet. Tue, 07 Jul 2009 03:45:21 GMT http://infj.tribe.net/thread/562ea2cf-55fd-489d-bd74-0157361b29cd#01292698-4225-480c-93dd-233239c03a6d Jack 2009-07-07T03:45:21Z http://infj.tribe.net/thread/562ea2cf-55fd-489d-bd74-0157361b29cd#01186466-4b2e-4864-afe9-f44df9eb30ea Study group? Tue, 07 Jul 2009 01:50:33 GMT http://infj.tribe.net/thread/562ea2cf-55fd-489d-bd74-0157361b29cd#01186466-4b2e-4864-afe9-f44df9eb30ea $item.owner.firstName 2009-07-07T01:50:33Z http://infj.tribe.net/thread/562ea2cf-55fd-489d-bd74-0157361b29cd#989c9b72-856f-4d8d-91bb-25dc04ea62f4 I'll try. Tue, 07 Jul 2009 01:05:06 GMT http://infj.tribe.net/thread/562ea2cf-55fd-489d-bd74-0157361b29cd#989c9b72-856f-4d8d-91bb-25dc04ea62f4 Meki 2009-07-07T01:05:06Z http://infj.tribe.net/thread/562ea2cf-55fd-489d-bd74-0157361b29cd#07743edb-1cb6-4bae-9e75-cd258de0c26a Thanks Waylon your response was what I needed to round out everyone else's advice! Thanks for the "how-to" advice also. Yes, I see I will have to also get rid of the ENFJ so as not to antagonize the INFJ. How do I know he's INFJ?He does every typical thing INFJ's describe. He is an EXTREME loner, EXTREMELY emotional and intensely passionate, EXTREMELY private, but yet completely open about the weirdest things, a perfectionist, and quick to wrap things up - without necessarily getting all the information. Will be fiercely adamant about something, but then after thinking about it, will admit to himself (not necessarily others) that he was wrong and will change, and will make sure that he is demonstrative about his change of opinion even if he doesn't vocalize it. He is very strong with the "N" force and we are weirdly connected to each other...I can think of something, such as it is hot in here while we're in study group together, and he will go open a window, or that family's child is making too much noise, and he will get up and offer to take the child out to calm it down. He's completely non-traditional - which is why I think the points you made were key. I actually am non-traditional too, but it is hard to fight against the current - you know what I mean? I don't mind doing the approaching at all, it is against how I was raised, but not against my innermost beliefs. I truly believe it doesn't matter who did what as long as two people who love each other are together and happy. Tue, 07 Jul 2009 01:03:16 GMT http://infj.tribe.net/thread/562ea2cf-55fd-489d-bd74-0157361b29cd#07743edb-1cb6-4bae-9e75-cd258de0c26a Meki 2009-07-07T01:03:16Z http://infj.tribe.net/thread/562ea2cf-55fd-489d-bd74-0157361b29cd#93e7db2a-88fb-47df-8625-6705bc4e15cd Okay, here's one more INFJ male's opinion. I'm about the same age as the guy you're after, so I've been trying to think what a gal could do to "catch" me. The first thing I want to get out there is this: you said you were raised with a "traditional male-female model". While I can't speak for *all* INFJ males, I can say that I'm not a big fan of "traditional" male-female behavior. We often make up our own rules for that sort of thing. I, for one, am often completely repulsed by the idea that I'm "supposed" to do something. If I'm "supposed" to do something it makes me want to do the opposite thing. If "A" is the most popular thing then I often prefer "B" simply because it's less popular. It's weird, I know, but I like being different and outside ofthe mainstream. Meki: "I was also worried that he would lose long term respect for me if the situation eventually led to marriage." No way! Quite the opposite. I think it's more likely that he will come to respect you more and more for being a capable, competent woman. Meki: "I was told by married people - mind you non "N" married people that the way you begin a marriage is how it will always be." People often don't change much. I know I'm overgeneralizing here, but women often see men as "projects" to "fix up" and "improve". That doesn't work, and leads to frustration. For INFJ's, what you see if what you get, although there are some hidden facets that may cpme as pleasant surprises when you discover them 15 years into your relationship. If there's something you don't like about him it's not likely to change, and if you expect change it will just lead to resentment. Which leads to: Meki: "So if I have to do the initiating I will ALWAYS have to initiate everything in the marriage." This is entirely possible. You should decide in advance whether you can live with that or not. Poor Sarah has to do most of the initiating in our relationship, but she's an ENTP and pretty happy to "take the initiative". She knows she can't bulldoze me when it comes to something that is important to me, so she's content with that arrangement. Okay, now with the disclaimers out of the way... how would someone "catch" me? Simple. They would have to *want* to spend quality one-on-one time with me without other people around. I like it when people can talk about their inner feelings with me, so if a gal wanted to spend some time with me and talked to me about how she felt about me, openly and honestly, I'd probably swoon. Don't be afraid to be vulnerable, either. We like that, and we're not going to hurt you for opening up. INFJ's are very careful when it comes to that sort of thing. I don't do subtle and I don't pick up on hints or clues. For me to "get" something it has to be pretty clear and straightforward. Like Jack said, direct is good. INFJ's have pretty good BS detectors, so if it's not sincere we know immediately. Why are INFJ's reluctant to be the ones who initiate things? Again, I can't speak for everyone, but for me personally I know I have a big fear of rejection. Rejection is a tough experience. It's pretty crushing for us because we invest so much of ourselves and our energies into a relationship. Sometimes the fear of that pain is enough to make us want to avoid the risk unless we're SURE we won't be rejected. Thus, it's often easiest to just let the other person do the asking. That's also why we don't like "competing" with other males for a female and why we say things like, "I want a gal who wants me for who I am." Out of curiosity, how do you know he's an INFJ? So, what kind of line on a one-on-one date makes my heart melt? Vulnerable, unambigious, honesty. "You want to know a secret? I, uh... I've... oh gosh, I'm so nervous all of a sudden... I've had a crush on you for a long time. I've just been too scared to tell you about it because I was afraid you wouldn't like me or that you would be turned off if I approached you. And I didn't know how to get your attention to find out if you would be interested in dating me. To be totally honest, I even had to go ask some of my friends online for advice on how to bring this up. They though I was being a little bit silly, but told me I needed to just come out and talk to you about it." One other thing I'd like to add: after that conversation (or better yet before that conversation) you'll have to let the other guy know to keep his paws off you. You may know tha tyou aren't interested, but I don't think the "other guy" knows that you are not interested, since he keeps trying. When we're in a relationship we're "all in". The downside to that is that we expect our partners to be just as committed, which means letting the other potential suitors know that you are not available. If you are officially dating the INFJ, it will be *very* frustrating and hurtful to him to see the other guy continue to flirt with you. I've had several relationships go sour in my younger days because of that, and even though I've learned to deal with it, it's still painful when it happens. Sarah and I have been dating for 5 years and I still get irritated when another guy flirts with her. I *know* I don't have anything to worry about, but It annoys the crap out of me anyway. Mon, 06 Jul 2009 15:11:48 GMT http://infj.tribe.net/thread/562ea2cf-55fd-489d-bd74-0157361b29cd#93e7db2a-88fb-47df-8625-6705bc4e15cd Waylon 2009-07-06T15:11:48Z http://infj.tribe.net/thread/562ea2cf-55fd-489d-bd74-0157361b29cd#0b719a67-ae62-4dbd-8286-37785da6f4e7 agreed on all... but bowling may be a bit much. Just get him in a one on one discussion, make it warm and short and ask him if he wants to grab a coffee sometime. Make it a low key event and don't have anyone else around when you ask. Sun, 05 Jul 2009 03:13:28 GMT http://infj.tribe.net/thread/562ea2cf-55fd-489d-bd74-0157361b29cd#0b719a67-ae62-4dbd-8286-37785da6f4e7 TJ 2009-07-05T03:13:28Z http://infj.tribe.net/thread/562ea2cf-55fd-489d-bd74-0157361b29cd#f2acdbf3-f383-440c-81c2-b2557d0fcd45 Thanks Jack! I will be more direct. The problem is that your suggestion is 100% opposite of the traditional male-female model, and against how I was raised (by a traditional ESTJ mom). The man is "supposed" to do the pursuing and aggressive women are looked down upon. You're supposed to let the guy come to you. Frankly, it really doesn't matter to me who does the actual asking out. I had already come to the conclusion, being the "T" in the situation that I would have to do something, but I am worried about his reaction for the reason above. I was also worried that he would lose long term respect for me if the situation eventually led to marriage. I was told by married people - mind you non "N" married people that the way you begin a marriage is how it will always be. So if I have to do the initiating I will ALWAYS have to initiate everything in the marriage. Sun, 05 Jul 2009 01:00:34 GMT http://infj.tribe.net/thread/562ea2cf-55fd-489d-bd74-0157361b29cd#f2acdbf3-f383-440c-81c2-b2557d0fcd45 Meki 2009-07-05T01:00:34Z http://infj.tribe.net/thread/562ea2cf-55fd-489d-bd74-0157361b29cd#af29bc0c-e9b8-4f1d-a156-c2f423724078 Jack, Excellent point. Being direct is key. Sat, 04 Jul 2009 22:57:04 GMT http://infj.tribe.net/thread/562ea2cf-55fd-489d-bd74-0157361b29cd#af29bc0c-e9b8-4f1d-a156-c2f423724078 $item.owner.firstName 2009-07-04T22:57:04Z http://infj.tribe.net/thread/562ea2cf-55fd-489d-bd74-0157361b29cd#7f753a5b-61c3-4fee-9daa-052c8981ad40 Meki, I don't think it's too cheesy, but, I would recommend a more direct approach. Just ask him out. In case he hasn't gotten the message or finds himself too intimidated by the other guy, asking him out directly will dispel any questions. As an INFJ guy, I prefer a woman to ask me out, to take over direction of the relationship. I know that sounds odd, but, it's just easier for me to deal with. We do better responding than initiating. Just get direct with him. That's all you need to do. If he is not interested, he will avoid you in various ways, and then you will know to move on. If he is interested, he will keep going out with you. That simple. Sat, 04 Jul 2009 22:43:52 GMT http://infj.tribe.net/thread/562ea2cf-55fd-489d-bd74-0157361b29cd#7f753a5b-61c3-4fee-9daa-052c8981ad40 Jack 2009-07-04T22:43:52Z http://infj.tribe.net/thread/562ea2cf-55fd-489d-bd74-0157361b29cd#73afa372-5ce2-46c0-bc05-749c5c25fee4 Meki, INFJ's tend to be very dominant. They do not appear so, but they love to feel like they have complete control. This is why he gets mad when he sees you with the ENFJ. He feels that he is not in control. INFJ males also tend to be all or nothing. So, if you want a relationship with him, it has to be with him, and him only, for the long haul. If you do not have the possibility of marraige in mind, he will consider you a waist of time. He wants a serious, personal relationship. If you at least try this, keeping with the possibility of marraige in mind, he will trust you and give you a chance. If you break up eventually, fine, but at least you will have tried and he will feel the same. Remember, the key is earning his trust. Do something really special for him, something that requires hard work and effort that proves you are serious (but not a song). Any signs of flirtation or even being around other guys will make him think you are not serious nor trustworthy and a cheater. As far as that touchy thing, maybe I got a little off base. But, I will not lie, when a girl does something nieve and childish and something like pinching him (even on the butt), he may react kind of harsh, but he (the INFJ male) secretly likes it and thinks it is sexy and cute. When I said expect a negative reaction, I meant that he will say something like "I don't know, you seem to like that ENFJ guy a lot" or "oh yeah, well what about that ENFJ guy, he seems to like you a lot". Just make sure you explain the thing with the ENFJ. Sat, 04 Jul 2009 00:28:48 GMT http://infj.tribe.net/thread/562ea2cf-55fd-489d-bd74-0157361b29cd#73afa372-5ce2-46c0-bc05-749c5c25fee4 $item.owner.firstName 2009-07-04T00:28:48Z http://infj.tribe.net/thread/562ea2cf-55fd-489d-bd74-0157361b29cd#d6bfc2b3-98b6-4d6c-9062-4a93ae87a18f Oh okay thanks anon124. I was in my "T" when he told me to ask the other guy the question, so I was soooooooooo confused when I saw him marching off. In my mind was like "I did what YOU told me to do and now you're mad with me? What in the world?" I will definitely try to keep distance from ENFJ guy. I don't get it though, they're not even in the same league. ENFJ is just a kid in college, my INFJ is smashing, over 30, has a nice career, car and home. It seems utterly IMPOSSIBLE he would remotely consider the other bloke as competition and therefore feel any sort of jealous emotions towards him, but he does. He goes nuts whenever the other guy is around me. I was talking to him and as I finished, I tripped while turning around and bumped right into the ENFJ guy! I didn't even know he was behind me! I lost my balance and almost fell to the floor! ENFJ guy caught me, steadied me, put his arm around my shoulder then somehow got it around my waist, then somehow was holding my hand to support me as I got up, but then wouldn't let go of my hand as I tried to release his. All of this happened right in front of the INFJ! I know angered him and he probably thought me and the other guy have something going on, but it was all innocent on my part but the timing and everything was quite awful. I don't have a clue how to convince him I have ABSOLUTELY no interest, feelings or anything going on with ENFJ guy. Fri, 03 Jul 2009 23:29:00 GMT http://infj.tribe.net/thread/562ea2cf-55fd-489d-bd74-0157361b29cd#d6bfc2b3-98b6-4d6c-9062-4a93ae87a18f Meki 2009-07-03T23:29:00Z http://infj.tribe.net/thread/562ea2cf-55fd-489d-bd74-0157361b29cd#5f06d562-dcda-44f5-a63c-14353d35ebce Actually Ed, I am quite overwhelmed by "E's" in general, having been raised by an ESTJ. I like the comfort of being with a fellow introvert because they understand it is not necessary to have to speak every moment and won't insult me for my need for solitude. I'm an outgoing introvert, but I will need for my most intimate companion to understand my need for solitude without taking it personal. Generically I don't like "S" men for romance. There just is not enough intellectual depth. I like being able to look at a fellow "N" and have them intuit me without my saying a word, it is quite comforting. For my most intimate relationship, which will be marriage - I need the "N" in a man. Thanks for the insight Ed- it seems in other words I should be more "T" towards him in my behaviour. I am a naturally direct person, and because of that, whenever I even give the guy a compliment he goes bananas! One of my friends had an emergency and I told her to call him for help because I couldn't get to her in time and when I later saw and thanked him for helping her- he reacted so crazily! All I said was thanks for helping her, I really appreciated it because I couldn't get to her. You would have thought I did a great big cheer like a cheerleader or something by his reaction. Then later he started acting arrogantly/macho around me, and then when that obviously ticked me off, he became humble as if he was afraid to lose me. I'm soooooooooooooooo confused! I love him genuinely though and am willing to hang in there with the bloke - I believe he is worth it. It is hard for 2 "I's" to get together and I have received this counsel before - that I must make the first move as INFJs almost NEVER make a move. I have seen him move a smidge - wait for me, open his mouth, inhale, close his mouth, abruptly walk away without having said what he obviously wanted to say. I am planning to ask him out, but why did you say "just expect a negative response?" Expect a negative response when I ask him out, or if I touch him? (By the way he seems EXTREMELY sensitive to touch.) Or both? Fri, 03 Jul 2009 23:03:40 GMT http://infj.tribe.net/thread/562ea2cf-55fd-489d-bd74-0157361b29cd#5f06d562-dcda-44f5-a63c-14353d35ebce Meki 2009-07-03T23:03:40Z http://infj.tribe.net/thread/562ea2cf-55fd-489d-bd74-0157361b29cd#383447ce-42d5-460d-8c58-3c8307130f2c An INFJ is never going to try to compete if there's an extrovert around making it clear he's interested in you. He will assume he will lose (I know I would). He probably sees as flirting what you see as just friendly...especially since ENFJ guy is making it obvious it's flirting for him. I think you'd have to act more distant from ENFJ guy if you have to be in a situation with both. He didn't really want you to ask the other guy the question. Irrational, yes, but that would be the F. Fri, 03 Jul 2009 19:19:39 GMT http://infj.tribe.net/thread/562ea2cf-55fd-489d-bd74-0157361b29cd#383447ce-42d5-460d-8c58-3c8307130f2c Rachel 2009-07-03T19:19:39Z http://infj.tribe.net/thread/562ea2cf-55fd-489d-bd74-0157361b29cd#1478178c-bee0-4ed6-a7d1-f3284c9640b9 Poor guy, sounds like he has it rough. First off I wonder, is it even possible to "reel in" an INFJ male or female? I like Ed's idea of doing things alone with him that are more casual and safe. The other things you mention, Ed, would be right on base with what I'd want to see as female INFJ too. Just a thought that may be off base but... Could it be that the INFJ guy could be picking up actual "back off" signals from your guy friend? You may feel like your guy friend is just a kid but could he think differently and actually be setting up some of this? If you are not aware of it then you may actually be playing right into it (if this scenario even exists) - it could even be subconscious protective-posturing on your friends part rather then romantic feelings for you. For a person who is sensitive to energy (some INFJ's are empathic) the INFJ guy may actually not be too far off base with his concerns. Fri, 03 Jul 2009 05:29:58 GMT http://infj.tribe.net/thread/562ea2cf-55fd-489d-bd74-0157361b29cd#1478178c-bee0-4ed6-a7d1-f3284c9640b9 Michelle 2009-07-03T05:29:58Z http://infj.tribe.net/thread/562ea2cf-55fd-489d-bd74-0157361b29cd#e45b481e-8469-4562-b0ec-532e20e92fef Meki, As an INFJ male, I say that you are approaching this whole thing the wrong way. First of all, you should try going for your opposite, the ESFJ. But, if you really like this guy, do not try to appeal to his feeling side with a song. INFJ males try to suppress their feeling function, so as to not look womanly. If you want to appeal to the INFJ, you must be more direct. We INFJ males always assume the worst case scenario (as in the case with this guy). So making some sort of song will just make us think of things like "oh, she is playing me", or "she is just plain weird". A song is overbearing. Say what you mean, in a direct tone. If you must, make gentle physical contact (like a hand on the shoulder). Being honest is key. Do not buzz around the truth. You must ask him out, but make sure it is with no one else, just you two (he will feel that you are not that serious otherwise). An INFJ will usually be very hesistant and will almost never make a move. So, just expect a negative response. The physical contact and direct honesty may be a little overbearing to him at first, but he will find it kind of sexy. Be encouraging. Complement him on something he is good at or finds interesting, then he will feel more comfortable. At the right time, in this conversation, while his feeling function is takes precedent and he is so caught up in his feelings, ask him if he would like to do something sometime, with just you. Going bowling or going to see a movie is very safe and comfortable to him, and he will gain trust in you. Fri, 03 Jul 2009 05:06:46 GMT http://infj.tribe.net/thread/562ea2cf-55fd-489d-bd74-0157361b29cd#e45b481e-8469-4562-b0ec-532e20e92fef $item.owner.firstName 2009-07-03T05:06:46Z http://infj.tribe.net/thread/562ea2cf-55fd-489d-bd74-0157361b29cd#d4fcf6a4-8255-4be4-bd5c-35c414507e00 Okay , so I'm still trying to reel in an INFJ guy and wanted to know if a music CD created with lyrics that express how I feel about him is too cheesy of a gift. I thought (being the INTP I am) that it would show my "F" side and show him how sincere I am. Every single time the guy gets near to approaching me asking me out, I see him punking out because of imagining that I am interested in another guy an ENFJ . It is simply that the ENFJ guy is sooooo expressive and also happens to have a crush on me, but I only like him as a friend - like a little brother and have told this directly to the INFJ guy, but he doesn't believe it since I am nice to all guys. The 3 of us were in the same place and as I was finishing talking to him, I whipped around and bumped into the ENFJ guy who caught me, put his arm around my waist to steady me then grabbed my hand and slowly let it go all if front of the other guy! I wanted to die! It was so innocent on my part, but angered the INFJ. I don't know how to convince him nothing is going on. I can tell he really believes I like the other guy and thinks I was dishonest in saying I think of the other guy as a kid - which I truly do. I needed some information the other day and he said, "Why don't you ask (the ENFJ)?" So I asked the ENFJ the question and also had a short conversation with him and the INFJ just angrily marched off as he was standing almost next the ENFJ. I don't get what was angering him. He is the one who told me to ask the guy the question then he gets mad when I do? What does he want from me? So I want to show him how much I want him, but do it in a way that is personalized to him. What do you INFJ guys think? An NT female you like but are too intimidated to approach, who makes you stutter when you try to talk to her, bump into things, and who makes you feel jealous of every guy she talks to makes you a music CD with songs with a few lyrics that follow - any thoughts? (1) You know I see you | It's a disguise the way you treat me | You keep holding on to your thoughts of rejection | If you're with me you're secured... (2) I just melt away, fall like rain, every time I see your face, I go off I just want to break it down anytime you come around baby I could melt away in your arms... (3) Nothin' means as much - your smile, Nothin' seems to touch - your smile, when you smile - your smile | Oh, if anything I'd miss - your smile I never could resist - your smile... By the way can anyone relate to how this guy is acting? Thu, 02 Jul 2009 03:51:55 GMT http://infj.tribe.net/thread/562ea2cf-55fd-489d-bd74-0157361b29cd#d4fcf6a4-8255-4be4-bd5c-35c414507e00 Meki 2009-07-02T03:51:55Z